weekend review and things to come

i am back from a night in the woods.jackie, paula, frannie and i went on a quick getaway to visit our friend madeline who is living and working at breitenbush hot springs. we left the city around 6:30 last night and returned around 5:30 this evening.

topics of conversation included: exchanges of energy, roses and thorns, the change of season, break-ups, making choices, zhooping the hoo-hah, shoes, wisdom teeth surgery (pros and cons), tarot readings, saturn returns, etc.

music listened to; blonde redhead, beirut, teegan and sarah and mix cd made by frannie

car snacks included: fancy cheeses from new seasons, crackers, almond butter, rice cakes, almonds, cranberries, celery, carrots. 

it was nice to be out there. to spend time with others. the four of us had never really kicked it before. we soaked under the stars, drank tea and giggled over the ridiculousness of everything after being in the car for several hours. 

things have been going so well for me lately. i have had many moments of just feeling content with how things are. which is a fairly new concept for me. instead of worrying about what i "should" be doing differently.

coming back to the city, even after being gone for a mere 23 hours, has thrown me for a loop. it is always so good to switch up the routine. jumping back into the "groove" is always a bit more challenging. i am not feeling particular excited about going back to work and wondering what else there is to look forward to/be excited about in the near future.

i had spanish class tonight. wasn't as excited about it as i was last week. think it was a combination of me being tired and the material being tedious. 

saturday night my friends and i got dressed up all fancy-like and met up at chapman elementary to watch the vaux swifts do their thing. it was extremely crowded. we ate figs stuffed with blue cheese, noodle salad, carrot butter and crackers and buckwheat muffins. potlucks are always a bit of a challenge for me. i almost always feel weird afterwards. i tend to eat more than necessary to compensate for my social anxiety. then i will beat myself up for "losing control" or whatever. this is something i have been aware of and working on for a while and it feels tired and old.

after the swifts i ended up going to a free (for me) show at the wonder ballroom. i haven't been to a live show in so long. i enjoyed just sharing the space with other folks and the energy and sounds that the 2 bands were putting out there. 

there are so many things that i want, i have been practicing saying yes this week (accentuate the sssses). i have known what i want for a really long time and now i am just working on inviting that stuff to happen and not letting those voices of doubt and self hate get in my way. i am also examining my decision making process and the amount of energy i spend making decisions (and then second guessing them)..

the theme of the week is taking care of my body and honoring where i am at. acknowledging and appreciating my limits. staying realistic, positive and hopeful. 

"don't be shy, let your feelings roll on by" cat stevens, also sang by her frannie on her cat stevens club remix, made on garage band...